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Ep. 35: "You Give 'Em Israeli Eyes"

Ep. 35: “You Give ‘Em Israeli Eyes” - Roderick on the Line - Merlin Mann on Huffduffer

The Problems: Preparing the stage for Mr. Roderick; laminating the lady in the field; John battles mean stycks with Feminesium; oratory from a conveyor belt; graciously accepting a doll made of human hair; plus, everybody hates a crappy birthday grift.

[MP3] Ep. 35: "You Give 'Em Israeli Eyes"


Ep. 34: "A Shit Barge Full of Long Pigs"

Ep. 34: “A Shit Barge Full of Long Pigs” - Roderick on the Line - Merlin Mann on Huffduffer

The Problems: Brobdingnagian morning cookies; the time LTJG David Roderick (USN) kind of maybe scared off a Zero with his rogue Colt M1911; Merlin windmills through his brief Kneepads and Floppy Epaulets Phase; why John thinks depths charges are a careless and potentially orphan-endangering pussy move; John discovers an oxidizing superpower—then struggles to find a cool name; Billy Joel and his stupid goddamned loose tie bullshit; Merlin tries in vain to keep his new bell a little special; fortifying your underwater home against an attack by Navy SEALs; nobody just “walks away” from a Coffeetology® audit; John poses for Playboy with his cripplingly handsome friend, Jon Hamm; post-mortem on ’30s gangster things; Pete Townshend is attacked by a long-range baby marmot cannon; “Oooooo, hey, everybody, look at me! I’m some Somalian guy and I give everybody tickets!”; that one time when John and Merlin shot big guns; methods for concealing your (standard) yacht from Malaccan pirates; The Dardanelles Mountain Goat; streamlining childbirth via the metaphorical ordnance of Battlestar Galactica (no, the 1978 one); a much-needed clinic for teaching ladies proper loogie aperture; Really? Wooden knife? Really?; no, sir, you can’t slip a urethra by John Roderick; fantasies of Elle Macpherson on a juicy and super-hot Copenhagen run; arriving late to the Damascan spy game—perhaps in a robe; in Soviet Ukraine, collaborators Vichy you; never hide stuff in the actual yogurt place, because that’s just what they’d be expecting; apolougies from the deferential bottom gangs of Canada; the gun that lets pirates know when business is meant; okay, so, we’ll give Turkey maaaaaaaybe a “7”; one headlamp per doorknob; years John was literally soaking in war; plus, John and Merlin finally prepare to launch Hitler ’n Stuff!

Hitler & Stuff

[MP3] Ep. 34: "A Shit Barge Full of Long Pigs"


Ep. 33: "Starts to Slurry"

Ep. 33: “Starts to Slurry” - Roderick on the Line on Huffduffer

The Problems: The Conversion of the Jutes; maids of scullery, milk, and otherwise; hacks for avoiding Saturday fires; Roderick’s Law of Condescending Reverse Obsequiousness; No Claptons, No Claptons, No Claptons!; concentric naval circles around the seaman’s wheelhouse; the decline and fall of one anachronistic 11-year-old impressionist; Buck Owens, The Second Moog Enthusiast; yeah, well, The Fantastic Four already did that; John’s latest observations about windows; Supertrain to the rescue!; understanding epidemic famine from inside a moderately tight Methodist tube; an abridged retrospective of Wendy William Walter Carlos Williams Williams; dry burgers—you know, for kids; Merlin can’t even get into his whole Jean Grey Thing; the hosts’ shared dread of The Bikini Toll; things from which no good can come; important steps for qualifying your new Chapman Stickman; John shot first; “Shabbos, Wiry Shabbos”; Silicon Valley’s ironic afro aeronautics; why is this Wednesday different from all other days?; plus, Merlin repeatedly struggles to help John understand a canny but admittedly elaborate plan for interfaith human barter.

[MP3] Ep. 33: "Starts to Slurry"


Ep. 32: "Incidental Boners"


Ep. 32: “Incidental Boners” - Roderick on the Line on Huffduffer

The Problems: visions of candy-corn antennae; the 4 kinds of kids; casual racism toward lions; John’s kosher ambulance conundrum; things that used to be other things; a misspent youth in pipebomb sales; sitting precariously on the sill of gay; John and Merlin find consonance in a dot-com incubator; the superiority of French «ordnance et matériel»; Mr. Shackleford gets an earring; hanky code culture jams; understanding dancing and spitballs; O’Look, a restaurant; and Merlin’s grave discomfort with John’s copious bukkits of sexual Weltanschauung.

[MP3] Ep. 32: "Incidental Boners"


Ep. 31: "Our Orange Franklin"


Ep. 31: “Our Orange Franklin” - Roderick on the Line - Merlin Mann on Huffduffer

The Problems: Addressing the ersatz physicians of midwestern Christian aristocracy; The He-Man John Roderick Haters Club; goose-stepping at Schützenfest; enjoying a fancy meal at Sclerotic McStuffingtons™; Le Petite Mal Mort de «Mademoiselle»; the awkward moment when Olive Garden stops regarding you as “family”; some dueling freedoms of a very young America; how Merlin became a youthful “Senior”; and why John started crying when he learned that the trains never really ran on time.

It All Begins With Tubas

It All Begins With Tubas | Flickr - Photo Sharing!

[MP3] Ep. 31: "Our Orange Franklin"


Ep. 30: "Cement Gravy Boat of Suffering"

Ep. 30: “Cement Gravy Boat of Suffering” - Roderick on the Line - Merlin Mann on Huffduffer

The Problems: gripping at sand in Noordwijk; handcuffs on the rear-view mirror; dancing for children in a public square; how to stock up for John; trying to outsmart ghosts; learning why we stopped sleeping outside; how much for that dream girl in the window?; and the night John finally realized what The Light Dome was doing.

[MP3] Ep. 30: "Cement Gravy Boat of Suffering"


Ep. 29: "Eventually My Scabs Healed"

Ep. 29: “Eventually My Scabs Healed” - Roderick on the Line - Merlin Mann on Huffduffer

The Problems: hippies vs. stoners; lost in Wikipedia; thumbing a ride to Kilimanjaro; the Petty Thieves of Avignon; John’s raving on a Spanish beach; when good battles nice; 24-track tape you could read through; the persistence of zombies; living with shaka brah hand; great monks versus garden-variety crazies; manning a booth down by the fish-throwers; alignment for non-paladins; and—finally—a universe-saving theme song John can live with.

[MP3] Ep. 29: "Eventually My Scabs Healed"


Ep. 28: "The Sheriff of Twisp"

Ep. 28: “The Sheriff of Twisp” - Roderick on the Line - Merlin Mann on Huffduffer

The Problems: John’s compromised immune system; Achilles’ lung; octogenarian barrel rolls; compulsory camps for teens; a cup of hobo cigarettes; getting schooled by The Jesuit; a hurried snapshot in Harlem; why Merlin blames Joni Mitchell; and John’s potential as a reluctant, no-nonsense lawman.

[MP3] Ep. 28: "The Sheriff of Twisp"


Ep. 27: "Bellinghamming"

Ep. 27: ”Bellinghamming” - Roderick on the Line - Merlin Mann on Huffduffer

The Problems: John’s waxy buildup; The Bubble Bath Rotation; helping two halfway houses become a whole; some benefits of German underpants; Sly offers a PA some oral notes; Cal stands upon his head; Merlin’s unfortunate Era Era; A Brief History of John’s Egregious Rashes; and mastering the international hand gestures that ensure a great haircut.

[MP3] Ep. 27: "Bellinghamming"


Ep. 26: "Go Practice the Car"

Ep. 26: “Go Practice the Car” - Roderick on the Line - Merlin Mann on Huffduffer

The Problems: John refutes Poe’s telephone; surprising contagion of the beloved vuvuzuvuzela; Roger Daltrey: District Attorney; The ’Barrow Boy’s Patrician Shrug; a balrog in the dwarf mines; comments are still steadfastly disabled; white wizard potential; longevity means finding room in one’s book; John considers removing lady embolisms as a move; how you get the Center Square; Vincent Price’s productive eyebrows; why Van Halen’s making nothing off those damned coke mirrors; John identifies Merlin’s liquids and many songs about pirates; Triumph of the Poutine; the trouble with thinking; the night John’s pillows watched over him; inflammable roach clips; a rockabilly song about dragons; A Brief History of Unnavigable Carnival Mud; initiation into the family coven; John considers some costly boots for his kit; and, our first biological interlude.

Roderick on the Line stitch

Roderick on the Line stitch by beefranck

[MP3] Ep. 26: "Go Practice the Car"